The Full English: Full Plate

If I compared last week’s version of “The Full English” to an Adam Sandler movie, it’d be “Click.” Not very exciting, little going for it (Christopher Walken had a supporting role, usually all the credibility a movie would need), and wasn’t exactly a big hit with the public. Now, if I could compare this week’s edition to one of the Sandman’s films it’d be Billy Madison. It has everything, etc. I think you get the idea.
I won’t take the blame for last week’s subpar column as I had little to go off on. There was just not enough going on to produce a column worthy of my faithful Goal.com readers.
Thankfully for all the parties involved, this week is a whole different story. Not only do we have a full slate of EPL action this weekend to dig into, the Champions League resumes play on Tuesday with some of the juiciest match-ups I have seen in years. That’s right, those will be featured in this week’s Full English as well.Consider this my return to the big time. Consider this when Black Sabbath reunited with Ozzy Osbourne after the Dio years. Consider this my rebirth as a born-again journalist. I take this stuff pretty seriously, it’s what I do for a living. So when I’m not pleased with some of the work I produce, I take it straight to heart. For that, I apologize.
The last time I checked, however, this wasn’t a self help column. It’s a football column and that’s what we’ll cover. Last week was a bit of a wash as Manchester United lengthened their lead at the top. In the other match, not a lot to discuss. Where we stand now, the season is about two-thirds completed, with a final third remaining that will be oozing excitement. There will be plenty of moments for nail-biting at the edge of your seat.
It’ll break down as the top six teams and where they finish. Then there's the other 14 teams and who gets relegated. It’s looking increasingly likely that the big four will be broken up by a certain Midlands team, and that two other teams from the same area could get relegated. We could see three-peat champions, but no 20-goal scorers. The last 13 matches will be a bumpy ride, so strap in Goal.com readers, I’ll be your guide on this exotic footballing safari that is the English Premier League.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves; let’s concentrate on one week at a time.
The Bacon (as in Bringing It Home)
Aston Villa v. Chelsea (Villa Park, February 21st, 7:45 a.m. ET (not televised))
Unfortunately for all you footy fanatics out there, this one isn’t televised. Crazy, right? It is on kind of early, but that won’t stop some people. Regardless, this is hands down the top fixture of the weekend. Separated by only two points in 3rd and 4th place are Aston Villa and Chelsea; a win for either side would do wonders for their immediate league goals.
First off, Aston Villa. If they can take down the Blues it’d be Chelsea’s fifth loss this season, doubling the difference in losses compared to last season’s three. They don’t like to lose at Stamford Bridge, and haven’t been doing it regularly over the last few years. This match isn’t at Stamford Bridge, you say? That’s right, it isn’t and the droves of crazed claret and blue clad fans at Villa Park will make sure Guus Hiddink’s boys know where they are.
Knowing and caring are two different things.
In their prior meeting in October, Chelsea handily disposed of Martin O’Neil and co. 2-0, in a match that they dominated, with 35 shots, 14 on target, and the lion’s share of possession. It was an all-around, thorough beating. If it wasn’t for Brad Friedel’s heroics in net, the scoreline could have been way worse. That was October, however, and Aston Villa are a much different, much more confident team these days.
If Chelsea do manage to win, it’ll help restore the balance of things, putting them back up there with Manchester United and Liverpool in third place. They’d get three points under their belt with the new regime in charge. Most importantly, they’d get their heads back on straight after gaining three points from an extremely important confrontation with a team so close to them in the standings.
It’ll come down to who wants it more. Aston Villa are a much more united and level-headed club, while Chelsea have the edge in overall talent. It’s certainly an intriguing match-up. I have a slight wonder that revolves around the Blues line-up, considering they play a huge fixture against Juventus on Wednesday.
TFE Prediction: I like Chelsea in this one. Villa’s heads are still a bit low following their ouster from the FA Cup at the hands of Everton, while Chelsea will be temporarily buoyed by the new manager syndrome and take this one 2-1. A close match, for sure.Liverpool v. Manchester City (Anfield, February 22nd, 10 a.m. ET, Fox Soccer Channel)
Why even preview this game, right? It’s surely Liverpool’s for the taking. Their captain and driving force might be back, not to mention they’re welcoming one of the league’s most inconsistent teams to one of the league’s most consistently intimidating venues. What’s not to like in this one? Just skip to the prediction already.
To divulge a bit more (as this is my big comeback column), I can say so many bad things about Manchester City. Their coaching has been pretty terrible of late, and apparently it’s led to bust ups between the gaffer and some key players. They may score a ton of goals (tied for third in the league…with Liverpool), but they let in a ton.
One thing you cannot question however, is the talent that is up and down this roster. They have it. It’s just a matter of using it. They didn’t last weekend, but they did the week before. Maybe they’re due this week in front of the Kop. I’m sure Craigy boy would love to blast a couple past his old team.
TFE Prediction: I love upsets. I love the underdog. They are the best. Don’t count on either showing up in this one. Reds up 3-1.
Newcastle v. Everton (St. James’ Park, February 22nd, 3:00 p.m. ET, Fox Soccer Channel (delay))
An intriguing match-up. Similar to Man City, Newcastle are a team one never knows which edition will show up. It could be the team that beat Aston Villa 2-0 or the team that got spanked 5-1 by Liverpool. Everton don’t suffer the same affliction, as they have been the model of strong form under David Moyes, rarely suffering more than a handful questionable results in a row.
The Magpies have slowly been pulling themselves out of the cellar and now sit in 13th place. As I feel like I mention every week, they are within a fingertip’s reach of the drop zone, sitting only three points out of 18th. So in actuality, their standing has no standing with me. Unless you’re 10th or above, you don’t hold a place in my heart. Sorry to say, but the bottom half of the table is a mess.
My guess is Everton makes a point of this on Sunday. Even if it is at the beautiful park known as St. James’, Newcastle will do little to prove their worth against a superior team.
TFE Prediction: Maro Fellaini does his thing and nets for Everton as the Toffees win convincingly, 3-1.
Champions League Calamari (Flash Fried Edition)
Inter Milan v. Manchester United: The most interesting of all the EPL match-ups in the Champions League. Two-time defending Italian champions against the two-time defending champions of England. My two favorite mangers. My two favorite teams to play as in FIFA 09. How do you separate them? Form, that’s how. Manchester United have it, and will settle for a well-deserved draw going back to Old Trafford. Prediction: 1-1 tie.Arsenal v. Roma: Luciano Spalletti’s team boast my favorite player outside of England in the talismanic Francesco Totti. Arsenal have very few players that I like. This isn’t a popularity contest though, and right now the Gunners are a better team and will take the first leg. Prediction: ArsenalChelsea v. Juventus: Another tough call as the teams are similar in lots of ways. My gut is telling me the Bridge shows outsiders how tough a place it can be to play in, momentarily restoring the old glory of years past. Prediction: ChelseaReal Madrid v. Liverpool: Would be a great final, don’t you think? The Spanish influence of Liverpool playing the Spanish giants themselves. It’s not to be, however, as these two meet in the first knockout round. I think the Reds will hold out for a draw in this one, despite being dangerously outplayed. Prediction 1-1 tie.The Toast (as in Of The EPL)
Joe Kinnear, Newcastle: The gaffer has apparently recovered well from the serious heart surgery he had a week ago, and is thanking well-wishers through the club’s website. Good to see he made it through ok and I hope to see him back on the touchline soon.
Jimmy Bullard, Hull: I put the blame on Phil Brown for breaking the bank for him. It’s karma, really. He left Fulham, a perfect situation in many regards, because they wouldn’t give him more money. Now he’s out for the season with a knee injury and is staring relegation in the face with a floundering Tigers side who have one win in their last 10 matches.Paul Scholes, Manchester United: Another one of my all-time favorites, Paul Scholes is playing some brilliant football at the moment, similar to what he has done his entire career with the Red Devils. His opening goal against Fulham was beautiful. I just wish Mark Schwarzer would have realized it and let it go in without the awkward deflection he put on it. Simply put, Scholes is one of the most intelligent and visually aware football players I have ever seen.
The Dressing (as in What To Wear)
2008-2009 Real Madrid Away - Sergio Ramos #4
In honor of the resumption of the Champions League next week, the jersey for this edition has a bit of Spanish flavor. One of the brightest young stars in the world, Sergio Ramos is as complete a defender as you’ll find. Plus, the jersey itself is a tasty shade of blue that compliments me quite well.
Leicester Update:
14 matches to play, 10 points clear. No need to worry, all things are well in Fox-land. I just wish I was there for the last part of the season when I could see Walkers Stadium go wild when we actually lift some sort of silverware. It’s been a while…
And Finally…The Black Pudding of the Week:Eric Cantona, Manchester United: I’m feeling a bit nostalgic (and a bit too tired to think), but I feel like my favorite player of all-time deserves a mention in “The Full English.” There has never been anyone like him, and I doubt there ever will be. His charisma was immense and the pitch could barely contain him. Just a unique personality like few the game has ever seen. How could you not love him in those Nike “Joga Bonito” commercials? He comes off a bit crazy (just ask Matthew Simmons, Crystal Palace supporter), but it works as his game bleeds emotion and intensity. His face when he scored that amazing chip shot against Sunderland will forever be etched in my mind…and he’s French.